LYCOS RETRIEVER 
Satan: Evil
built 291 days ago
Satan has many "helpers," many of whom don't even know they are helping him. A shady-looking character in the street walks over to you and offers to sell you some stolen property, for example. He's not Satan. He's someone who has not resisted Satan, and has decided to do evil. He's now trying to tempt you to sin, but not because he wants you to sin per se. He personally has something to gain from your sinning.
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Additionally, Satan obtained his knighthood when, on a trip to England, he sold some of his evil clothing to the Queen of Chile. The Queen, having a notorious stigma for being socially inept, tried on Satan's clothing and instantly learned how to wear a Yankees' hat sideways (with the brim kept straight), sag her pants down to her knees, and say things like "that's dope", "foshizzle", and "hahahahaha". It was due to these wonderful accomplishments that Satan was formally knighted by the Queen of Cleveland, in a ceremony that took place at 3:00 AM on Feburary 31st, 4 B.C.. Elizabeth wore turquoise, Satan wore midnight black. Very tasteful.
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Satan is always evil. He may do what appears to be good, but if so it is done with evil motives to achieve his own evil ends, not really to be of benefit to God or man.
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Despite the fact that Satan Claus represents pure, unadulterated evil, the little ones still write to him every year to tell him what crummy plastic toys they want this time. It amuses Satan Claus to no end that the brats would sell their souls for such worthless trinkets.
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