LYCOS RETRIEVER 
Kittens
built 261 days ago
Kittens are entertaining and full of fun. They ... have needs similar to raising a puppy. A young kitten will have more needs for attention and supervision than adult cats. As a kitten learns about the world by playing, your curtains, couch and flower arrangements can become sacrificed in the process. An adult cat can settle in faster, and choose to nap in front of the window versus climb the drapes.
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Kittens are darling little animlals that require extra special attention, care, and love. When adopting a kitten at the appropriate age (6-8 weeks), caring for you kittens is fairly easy; you just need to make sure that her environment is safe, that she knows where the litter box is, and that she is eating food that is appropriate for her. (formula, soft food, or dry, hard cat food) Keeping a safe environment means making sure that your kitten cannot jump out of any windows (2nd story and above) by having window screens, making sure there are no plants that are poisonous to cats in your home, making sure there are no poisonous substances within your kitten's reaches, ensuring that there are no dangling strings and things that your kitten could hang herself on, and making sure that there are no tiny, sharp objects on the ground that your kitten may swallow. However, if you have a kitten that is younger than 6 weeks old, you will need to know how to properly care for you kitten in the absence of her mother.
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Kittens have very sharp toenails. They can be trimmed with your regular fingernail clippers or with nail trimmers made for dogs and cats. If you trim too much, you will cut into the quick of the nail which will bleed and be painful. If this happens, neither you nor your cat will want to do this again. Therefore, a few points are helpful:
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Kittens are notoriously evil. When young, their favorite food is the mana of unsuspecting individuals. Lured in by the apparent cuteness of the beast, the victim is first violently gored with razor-sharp talons and vicious fangs. At this point, the kitten places its deadly, gaping maw inside the victim and begins to feast on its victim's soul. The entire process lasts no longer than thirty seconds, and by the time the feast is over, most do not realize their soul has been consumed. Kittens pose a severe threat to humanity and must be cooked with salt and pepper before they are allowed to feast upon any souls.
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Kittens develop very quickly from about two weeks of age until their seventh week. Their coordination and strength improve, they play-fight with their litter-mates, and begin to explore the world outside the nest. They learn to wash themselves and others as well as play hunting and stalking games, showing their inborn ability as predators. These innate skills are developed by the kittens' mother or other adult cats bringing live prey to the nest. Later, the adult cats ... demonstrate hunting techniques for the kittens to emulate.[8]
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Kittens, though small and cute, are actually ruthless warriors bent on devastation of the enemies heart and soul. And tasty innards. Mmmm. They are bred to be warriors, as kittens were invented by the Goths and ancient Germanic tribes. If you ever come across a kitten (you'd better hope you don't), be prepared for death. Once a kitten has locked on to your moist, tender belly, it will pounce upon you and latch to your leg, where upon it will slowly ascend to your stomach using its razor sharp claws.
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Kittens