LYCOS RETRIEVER 
Grieving: Loss
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People who are grieving will experience many reactions to their loss as they work toward resolution. At various times, but especially at first, the grieving person may experience intense and sometimes conflicting feelings or may deny that the loss has occurred. Strong feelings such as sadness, helplessness, loneliness, guilt, or anger can emerge. Experiencing and accepting these feelings as natural represents an important part of the recovery process. Ultimately, the grieving person reaches a point in the recovery process where the loss becomes integrated into his or her set of life experiences. He or she is now better able to carry out the tasks of daily living.
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Some people do not seem to go through the grieving process. They don’t cry at the funeral, they avoid mention of the loss of someone significant and return to normal activities very quickly. This may be their normal way of adjusting to loss and no harm may result. However, others may suffer from physical symptoms or repeated bouts with depression over the ensuing years. Sometimes the demands of family or work do not allow time to grieve. Or, some individuals may begin the grieving process and then get ‘stuck’.
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Acknowledging your loss is a start to healthy grieving. Let those close to you know that you've lost your dear dog or horse. These animals sometimes live with humans for their entire life spans, and the relationships formed are special and unique. Telling others what you've lost gives them a chance to share in your sorrow and give you hope for feeling better in the future.
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Abnormal grieving may last for an excessively long period of time. The person may show intense identification with the lost loved one. There may be a belief that he or she will soon die of the same cause as the loved one. The grieving person may insist that the loved one is still alive and show overly intense reactions in different situations.
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At many points after a loss, the grieving person can benefit from the support of others. Individual grief reactions can vary widely, not only from person to person, but ... within the same person over time. Accordingly, friends need to be ready to accept and support the griever through a wide range of emotions.
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For many people who are grieving a loss, the first impulse is to deny the loss. Grieving denial can range from downplaying the loss, as if it's not important, to having the delusion that the person or pet is still alive.
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