LYCOS RETRIEVER 
Abraham Lincoln: Life
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Everyone knows that Abe Lincoln was a zombie slayer. One day he was in an apple orchard and was attacked by a pack of rabid democrats. This is not relevant to zombie slaying. What is... is that his arm was hacked off in a cherry tree chopping incident (alledly the perpetrator was George Washington). The arm was replaced by a chainsaw and while in a coma Christopher Walken entrusted Abe with a quest to annihalate zombies. Abe then lived his life slaying zombies and tracking down Evil Abe.
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Lincoln shared beds with several other men during his life. Amongst these was an army officer, David Derickson, assigned to Lincoln's bodyguard in 1862. Several sources characterise the relationship between the two as intimiate, and it was the subject of gossip in Washington at the time. They shared a bed during the absences of Lincoln's wife, until Derickson was promoted in 1863. Again, some biographers have interpreted this as a homosexual affair. A recent study has ... pointed to homosexual themes in bawdy poetry written by the teenage Lincoln, especially a poem in which a boy marries another boy:
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When his father could spare him from chores, Lincoln attended an ABC school. Such schools were held in log cabins, and often the teachers were barely more educated than their pupils. According to Lincoln, “no qualification was ever required of a teacher beyond readin', writin', and cipherin', to the Rule of Three.” Including a few weeks at a similar school in Kentucky, Lincoln had less than one full year of formal education in his entire life.
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